Hollywood Releases of the Month ::: October 2008

October 2008 Theatrical Releases:

OCTOBER 3, 2008:

APPALOOSA - Starring Viggo Mortensen and Ed Harris

BEVERLY HILLS CHIHUAHUA - Starring Drew Barrymore and Andy Garcia

BLINDNESS - Starring Mark Ruffalo and Julianne Moore

FLASH OF GENIUS - Starring Greg Kinnear and Dermot Mulroney

HOW TO LOSE FRIENDS AND ALIENATE PEOPLE - Starring Kirsten Dunst and Simon Pegg

NICK AND NORAH'S INFINITE

PLAYLIST - Starring Michael Cera and Kat Dennings

RACHEL GETTING MARRIED (Limited) - Starring Anne Hathaway and Rosemarie DeWitt

OCTOBER 10, 2008:

BODY OF LIES - Starring Leonardo DiCaprio and Russell Crowe

CITY OF EMBER - Starring Saoirse Ronan and Harry Treadaway

QUARANTINE - Starring Columbus Short and Jennifer Carpenter

THE EXPRESS - Starring Dennis Quaid and Rob Brown

OCTOBER 17, 2008:

MAX PAYNE - Starring Mark Wahlberg and Mila Kunis

THE SECRET LIFE OF BEES - Starring Dakota Fanning and Queen Latifah

SEX DRIVE - Starring James Marsden and Josh Zuckerman

W - Starring Josh Brolin and Elizabeth Banks

OCTOBER 24, 2008:

CHANGELING - Starring Angelina Jolie and John Malkovich

HIGH SCHOOL MUSICAL 3: SENIOR YEAR - Starring Zac Efron and Vanessa Hudgens

PASSENGERS - Starring Anne Hathaway and Patrick Wilson

PRIDE AND GLORY - Starring Edward Norton and Colin Farrell

SAW V

OCTOBER 31, 2008:

ROCKNROLLA - Starring Gerard Butler and Thandie Newton

ZACK AND MIRI MAKE A PORNO - Starring Elizabeth Banks and Seth Rogen

P.S: All Dates pertain to the USofA Box offices

Roadside Romeo Movie:::: A sneak peek!!

Well i took a 'lil longer to put up this post about the Walt Disney-Yashraj pictures Joint venture Roadside Romeo ...but then its better l8 than never, rite folks? ....

Roadside Romeo is a movie by first time director and one-time child actor Jugal Hansraj, with voices by Kareena Kapoor and beau Saif ali Khan with funny man Javed Jaffery (hmmm the movie does promise some fun then!!), this movie's about a happy-go-lucky dog who falls into some hard tmes and how he gets out of it..

...anyways, I have previously bantered a lot about this movie in my other posts. So for this time, just sit back and enjoy the trailers...they say it all ...we start with the official theatrical trailer from the official Roadside Romeo website..

The movie hits the box office this festive Diwali season ...

The official website for Roadside Romeo is here

Max Payne Movie Releases Oct 17th ::::

Hmmm folks the cult game, Max payne's movie version seems to be finally ready to hit the screens ...so without much ado here's the low down..

Story:

Based on the hard-hitting interactive video game, "Max Payne" tells the story of a maverick cop determined to track down those responsible for the brutal murder of his family and partner. Hell-bent on revenge, his obsessive investigation takes him on a nightmare journey into a dark underworld. As the mystery deepens, Max Payne is forced to battle enemies beyond the natural world and face an unthinkable betrayal.

Starring:

Mark Wahlberg, Mila Kunis, and Chris 'Ludacris' Bridges as part of the main cast.

The trailer of the movie is quite good, well i found it awesome. From the looks of it though, the ppl seem to have stuck to the same storyline which makes the Max Payne franchise so appealing.

But, some viewers are of the opinion that Micheal Madsen(Kill Bill,Reservoir Dogs etc.) would have suited the role of the troubled,insomniac,painkiller-popping policeman much better. I have put a video some people put up at you-tube for the same(by the way for folks who are dumb: the date at the end of the video is fake)... and u know wat??..i felt the same at one point heh heh..but our Marky mark's not to be ignored folks...wat say u?

Hopefully, this movie will fare better than the other game movies which were made earlier(Hitman being the most recent among the cult ones)..most of which fell flat in the box office, the USP of this one being the good dash of hollywood movie stylization of the game itself. The winged guys flying all over the place seem to be an addition though, hope they dint go overboard with the feathered fiends ;P.

Max Payne directed by Irish filmmaker John Moore, with screenplay written by first-time writer Beau Thorne and Mark Wahlberg in the lead hits screens this October 17th.

so 'till l8r

enjoy the trailers...

oh! and by the way this is the Max payne official website : CLICK

The Movie Trailer:

the Micheal Madsen Video(fake Max payne trailer in You tube):

Bon Jovi snubbed by Rock and Roll Hall of Fame !!!

The veteran New Jersey rockers, Bon Jovi, won't be blazing in glory in 2009 at the inductions to the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, first year that they are eligible.

For the uninitiated, The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame and Museum is a museum located on the shores of Lake Erie in downtown Cleveland, Ohio, United States, dedicated to recording the history of some of the best-known and most influential artists, producers, and other people who have in some major way influenced the music industry, particularly in the area of rock and roll. The museum is part of the city's redeveloped North Coast Harbor.

Artists become eligible for the Hall of Fame 25 years after the release of their first single or album and are represented in an exhibition at the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame and Museum in Cleveland, Ohio.

This year’s nine nominees, who will be whittled down to five inductees, are Metallica, Run-D.M.C., the Stooges, Jeff Beck, War, Chic, doo-wop group Little Anthony and the Imperials, pioneering rockabilly singer Wanda Jackson (the “Queen of Rockabilly”) and soul singer-songwriter Bobby Womack.Five of the nine nominees will be inducted April 4, in a ceremony at Public Hall in Cleveland rather than the ceremony's usual site (the Waldorf Astoria Hotel in New York). The inductees will be announced in January.

Well, there is some solace for Bon Jovi considering that lots of other candidates were snubbed as well: Yes, Kiss, Genesis, Brian Eno, Chicago, Neil Diamond ...to name a few.

Morever, being a rockstar/playing rock...was always like somthing that was opposed to any frilly official acceptance, like striking out on your own..rebellious etc etc...so this non-nomination kinda satisfies the idea/philosophy behind being a rocker...I guess Bonjovi won't be giving The ROck and Roll Hall of Fame a "Bad Name" this time atleast ..heh heh!!

anyways...

till l8r,

tk care...

p.s; almost all the pictures are taken from wikimedia..except for the first one which is from the Rock and Roll Hall of fame website

Live Earth Concert In India::: Bon Jovi to rock the show!!!

Hey hey hey people!!...the popular Live Earth Concerts for climatic awareness touches down  to India this December. This event is like a sequel to the hugely successful series of concerts held last year. These were organized by former US Vice President and now custodian of environmental awareness, Mr. Al Gore. That event saw an estimated two billion people watch 150 acts perform simutaneously in 11 cities around the world!! (Phew!! now thats wat i call an audience!!). Live Earth 2008 Concert in India will be co-produced by Mumbai-based event management company Wizcraft Entertainment and Live Earth producer Kevin Wall.

The Bachchan family members, including actress wife Jaya, actor son Abhishek and his wife, the former Miss World and actress Aishwarya Rai Bachchan, are expected to participate. But, the most prominent among them The Big B, Amitabh Bachchan plays the most important role this time too, like always. He's going to be the spokesperson for Live Earth India.

The 'Live Earth' initiative by Emmy Award-winning producer Kevin Wall and Al Gore has found support in co-nobel prize winning environmentalist Rajendra Pauchari and Director Shekhar Kapoor(who'll also serve as the creative director of the event), besides Bachchan. 

Jon Bon Jovi's Band is almost a surety for the concert, which will have many more internationaly famed performing artists on it. All the people on the show will have their take on the Issue at hand i.e. to bring worldwide awareness on the environmental issues. The benefeciaries of this concert are; Pachauri's  TERI ( The Energy and Research Institute) and

 an organisation 'Climate project India', which is dedicated to climate issues and poverty alleviation. For TERI, the artists hope to create awareness for the "Light A Billion Lives",  a project that aims to put a solar-powered lantern in a billion homes. This a project 

 promoted by the eminent

 New Delhi-based Indian scientist Rajendra Pachauri who shared the 2007 Nobel Peace Prize with Al Gore.

Live Earth 2008 India takes place on December 7 at the 20,000-seat Mumbai Andheri Sports Complex.

Keep watching this space for more updates on this.

Ciao,

Till L8r

HAve fun and Make merry!!

Animation Movie ::: Ramayana - the Epic

Another news of a major Animation movie folks. This time its Ramayana. This annnouncement by Maya Entertainment comes at the heels of Maniratnam announcing his own live action Ramayana Movie with a formidable screencast consisting of Bollywood and tamil actors.

The animation movie will be directed by Chetan Desai, and have voice-overs by Juhi Chawla (Sita), Manoj Bajpai (Ram), Ashutosh Rana (Ravan), and Mukesh Rishi (Hanuman).

Desai is keen on the promotion of the feature for raising awareness on the Indian Mythological Stuff.

Hmmm...though I, for one, would like to see film-makers coming out with more innovative and original stuff akin to what the Hollywood/Japanese do, without just rehashing the old stuff left behind. But considering the economics, awareness, stigma of animated stuff being associated with immaturity and the great Indian Mythological Hangover...this would be really hard to do but certainly not impossible.

"Ramayana-the epic" animation movie hits screens early 2009

ciao then, till l8r

Have fun and Make Merry!!

A Fox enters the Bollywoods!!:::Twentieth Century Fox forms Fox Star Studios

Twentieth Century Fox has entered bollywood following in the heels of other major Hollywood Film studios like Universal and Sony, to form Fox Star Studios. This is  a  joint venture between Fox and the Asian satellite broadcasting Star, both part of tycoon Rupert Murdoch's empire NewsCorp. 

Hope this venture will churn out better stuff than what Sony had to offer thru last year's super dud, Sawaariya. 

My personal feelings are mixed towards the live action category of films that will be produced from these stables, cos its pretty tough to get the Indian audience right. But with titles like Minority Report, iRobot, The TransporterX-Men etc Fox is a force to be reckoned.

On  the animation front though, the scenery looks quite rosy with Disney tying up with YashRaj house for their ani-flick, Roadside Romeo directed by Jugal Hansraj(of Mohabbatein and Masoom fame) to be followed by couple of more such features from various studios. I am quite looking forward to all the cool animation stuff they are goin to bring on.

Coming back to the dope, this new venture will be helmed by Vijay Singh as its CEO, who currently holds the position of President, Strategy 

and Corporate Development of STAR India.

Fox STAR Studios India plans to produce Bollywood and Indian regional films. It will also build a national theatrical distribution footprint and enhanced capabilities in the home entertainment and digital media platforms in India while also leveraging Fox Theatrical Network's global distribution strength across 44 countries worldwide.

Hmmm... With Sly(arrey apna Rambo re!), snoop dogg etc. etc being roped into the loop, seems like Hollywood is all ready to storm the Bollywood castle on the home turf this time ppl!!... Have fun!!

For those who "Chrome" in late!!

Hmmm lots of buzz surrounding the newborn Chrome. The pros, the cons..the easy chrome hacks, the not so easy Chrome hack-nots ...like it or not, if you are a web surfer chances are u haven't been able to ignore it. Though I have been commenting and reading on it on some other sites and blogs, i still find it too early for my blog to carry a verdict on it (its still a baby after all!! let it grow ppl!).
Anyway for the time being, I have simply loved reading about the eComic on Chrome the people at Google have put up.
Have fun reading it like I did.
Till l8r,
Ciao!

Underworld: Rise of the Lycans :::a sneak peek

Hmmm, its coming pretty soon Underworld the prequel


The story:
The third film of the Underworld franchise delves into the origins of the centuries-old blood feud between the aristocratic vampires, known as Death Dealers, and the barbaric Lycans (werewolves). A young Lycan, Lucian (Michael Sheen), emerges as a powerful leader who rallies the werewolves to rise up against Viktor (Bill Nighy), the cruel vampire king who has persecuted them for hundreds of years. Lucian is joined by his secret lover, the beautiful vampire Sonja (Rhona Mitra), in his battle to free the Lycans from enslavement.

The negative:
NO KATE BECKINSALE...thats the biggest trough on this movie..but the story requires this cos this movie's about the time before Selene (Kate) was taken in by Viktor (Bill Nighy)


The positive:
F/x maven Patrick Tatopoulos, who developed the creatures for the first two films in the franchise, will helm "Underworld 3: The Rise of the Lycans," with Michael Sheen, Bill Nighy and Rhona Mitra aboard to star. "Underworld" creator Len Wiseman will produce alongside Lakeshore's Tom Rosenberg, Gary Lucchesi and Skip Williamson.



My verdict:
Wait and watch..hope the new one's atleast a scratch on the older stuff.





"Underworld 3: The Rise of the Lycans," stars Michael Sheen, Bill Nighy and Rhona Mitra, from a screenplay by Danny McBride.

Oh and by the way, Rosenberg assured that this departure was consistent in the original plans for an Underworld trilogy, and that a fourth film with Kate Beckinsale and Scott Speedman is still possible. (Hurrah!!!!)


so 'til l8r
Rajarshi Sharma says
"Ciao and take care"

Hollywood releases of the Month::::

This post is for my readers in the US (hope its of some use)

September 2008 Hollywood Releases::

click on the links for further info (source: http://www.about.com/

SEPTEMBER 5, 2008

BANGKOK DANGEROUS - Starring Nicolas Cage and Shahkrit

SURFER, DUDE (Limited) - Starring Matthew McConaughey and Woody Harrelson

SEPTEMBER 12, 2008
BURN AFTER READING - Starring George Clooney and Brad Pitt

RIGHTEOUS KILL - Starring Al Pacino and Robert De Niro

TOWELHEAD (Limited) - Starring Aaron Eckhart and Toni Collette

THE WOMEN - Starring Meg Ryan and Annette Bening

SEPTEMBER 17, 2008
APPALOOSA (Limited) - Starring Viggo Mortensen and Ed Harris

SEPTEMBER 19, 2008
BATTLE IN SEATTLE - Starring Charlize Theron and Michelle Rodriguez

THE DUCHESS - Starring Keira Knightley and Ralph Fiennes

GHOST TOWN - Starring Ricky Gervais and Greg Kinnear

IGOR - Starring John Cusack and Steve Buscemi

LAKEVIEW TERRACE - Starring Samuel L Jackson and Patrick Wilson

MY BEST FRIEND'S GIRL - Starring Kate Hudson and Dane Cook

SEPTEMBER 26, 2008
BLINDNESS - Starring Mark Ruffalo and Julianne Moore

CHOKE - Starring Sam Rockwell and Anjelica Huston

EAGLE EYE - Starring Shia LaBeouf and Michelle Monaghan

THE LUCKY ONES - Starring Rachel McAdams and Michael Pena

MIRACLE AT ST ANNA - Starring Derek Luke and Michael Ealy

NIGHTS IN RODANTHE - Starring Diane Lane and Richard Gere

a change in my URL

Hmmm have been pondering about changing my feed URL since long..cos i felt it was too long and too fangled meaningless to most ppl.. So am changin it to another long and meaningless one

http://rajsharmablogs.blogspot.com 

Sorry for the  inconvenience caused ppl....my apologies...but I dont think many ppl would hurt ..its not like the sun is rising from the west or sumthin rite???

Google chrome:::The story till now

So, Google claimed to have captured 1% share of the Browser pie on the first day of its release. But, the sceptic that I am, I waited for some third party results verifying the same.

Got the lowdown from the statcounter.com blog:

This table shows which browsers are losing share to chrome:

	IE	FireFox	Safari	Chrome	Other
Aug 28	68.17%	24.66%	2.83%	N/A	4.33%
Aug 29	67.81%	24.78%	2.84%	N/A	4.57%
Aug 30	65.41%	26.38%	3.04%	N/A	5.17%
Aug 31	64.49%	26.91%	3.06%	N/A	5.56%
Sep 01	66.92%	25.26%	2.99%	N/A	4.84%
Sep 02*	67.58%	24.36%	2.91%	N/A	5.06%
Sep 03	67.81%	23.54%	2.70%	1.11%	4.87%
Sep 04	70.87%	21.26%	2.48%	1.15%	4.25%

The below table outlines the changes in market share over the period:

	IE	FireFox	Safari	Chrome	Other
Aug 28	-	-	-	-	-
Aug 29	(0.36%)	+0.12%	+0.01%	N/A	+0.24%
Aug 30	(2.40%)	+1.60%	+0.20%	N/A	+0.60%
Aug 31	(0.92%)	+0.53%	+0.02%	N/A	+0.39%
Sep 01	+2.43%	(1.65%)	(0.07%)	N/A	(0.72%)
Sep 02*	+0.66%	(0.90%)	(0.08%)	N/A	+0.22%
Sep 03	+0.23%	(0.82%)	(0.21%)	+1.11%	(0.19%)
Sep 04	+3.06%	(2.28%)	(0.22%)	+0.04%	(0.62%)

N.B: The Chrome browser was launched late in the day GMT time on Sept 2nd so the first full day of tracking for Chrome is Sept 3rd. For further stuff on the chrome story, please read the statcounter.com blog
But, my take on Chrome is, it is clean,good,sleek,fast, kinda makes me have a crush on it. But, I remain committed to mozilla firefox (till chrome trumps it I guess but dunno wen??) which, I feel, is streets better than chrome from both the viewpoints of lay as well as geek users.

Arjun the warrior prince:::now thats wat i call animation

Finally!!!!!, an Indian animation movie which I can really look forward to viewing. Caught the trailer and simply loved it!!(much better than drona for sure!!). Based on the perennial favorite Indian topic, mythology, sure to generate interest amongst all. My kudos to UTV for such a splendid looking production. Hopefully, the story will hold its own against the bollywood biggies cos thats the most important factor nowadays..so without much ado on this, catch the koool trailer below::: 

   

Drona::Preview

Hmmm...another futuristic movie with Priyanka chopra again! (I dont know wat's it wit piggy chops and sci-fi flix, i mean they are almost evolving into a new species or something!!??) ..


Just now saw the movie's teaser trailer(do catch it on the adjacent and all new youtube video bar
I just added for your viewing pleasure!) and quite frankly wasn't very impressed by what i saw.


Being a sci-fi thing, the first thing one looks forward to is the ambience and graphics presented (very unlike wat our dear friend Harry..the Baweja guy folks dont tell me u forgot??... would like us to presume from the looks of Love Story 2050..i watched that movie in 5 mins flat and still managed to hate it enough not to see anything related to it again...was so bad it made Saawariya look a classic!!!)....Well enough blah on the old flick..we discuss the matter in hand. Drona..


Well, as was talking, the graphics presented in the trailor was not

wat you would
call upto the mark..it kinda looked dated...quite the oppo
site to all the promo pix of it doing rounds of the web.
Maybe thats because of the long duration of production
it has undergone
or for other financial constraints, but the fact remains that
even after the prepostorous lifting of the famous desert storm scene from the Mummy, the graphics fails to hit the spot, it simply looks from a bygone hollywood era.
Moreover, Chota B looks plump(must be all the food his lovely

wife is cooking at home wen she's not acting heh eh...Hrithik would have done so so much better in this kind of a role) as for lovely piggy..she looks more like someone straight out of arabian nights than the tough bodyguard she's supposed to be in the movie (Someone redeem her with a good movie
please!!!!)....

Don't wanna banter more on this, you go watch the movie, I am gonna wait until it comes on some TV channel..will look good on the Telly am sure :-P

Karzz::a teaser...

Hmmmm...saw a teaser trailer for Karzz starring Him
mesh starring Himmesh Reshammaiya along with Urmila Matondkar and Shweta Kumar on the telly..and my "motor fingers" got into the act for another Bollywood Post.

Karzz is a supposed remake of yesteryear’s Rishi Kapoor hit Karz along with an extra Z. (Hope that doesn't translate to more zzz's in the theatre!! )

 :-P

Himmesh is all glammed with his new hairstyle (new hair rather!) and physique ..at his nasal best.  But as we all know, Himmesh is no Rishi and so it remains to be seen whether he can pull off the movie. One thing's for sure, the movie's gonna generate some mass interest considering Himmesh's fan following.

Didn't see much of the chicks to comment on them....

The teaser was as lavish as Himmesh's last release so it is quite apparent that they have splurged on this one too..

So wat say ppl?? gonna watch it or got some more important stuff to do huh??

Dog Story::: an email forward

This was a forward from my fren ashu on his Birthday.. good similie but i am an atheist and ashu hates dogs!!! ha ha ha...Didn't get it?? .. i know ..so keep reading...

" This explains why I forward jokes..

A man and his dog were walking along a road. The man was enjoying the scenery, when it suddenly occurred to him that he was dead..
He remembered dying, and that the dog walking beside him had been dead for years. He wondered where the road was leading them..

After a while, they came to a high, white stone wall along one side of the road..

It looked like fine marble.

At the top of a long hill, it was broken by a tall arch that glowed in the sunlight.
When he was standing before it he saw a magnificent gate in the arch that looked like mother-of-pearl, and the street that led to the gate looked like pure gold.

He and the dog walked toward the gate, and as he got closer, he saw a man at a desk to one side.
When he was close enough, he called out, "Excuse me, where are we?"

"This is Heaven, sir," the man answered.

"Wow! Would you ha pp en to have some water?" the man asked.

"Of course, sir. Come right in, and I'll have some ice water brought right up."
The man gestured, and the gate began to open..

"Can my friend," gesturing toward his dog, "come in, too?" the traveller asked.

"I'm sorry, sir, but we don't accept pets."

The man thought a moment and then turned back toward the road and continued the way he had been going with his dog.
After another long walk, and at the top of another long hill, he came to a dirt road leading through a farm gate that looked as if it had never been closed. There was no fence.

As he approached the gate, he saw a man inside, leaning against a tree and reading a book..

"Excuse me!" he called to the man. "Do you have any water?"

"Yeah, sure, there's a pump over there, come on in."

"How about my friend here?" the traveller gestured to the dog.

"There should be a bowl by the pump."

They went through the gate, and sure enough, there was an old-fashioned hand pump with a bowl beside it..
The traveller filled the water bowl and took a long drink himself, then he gave some to the dog..
When they were full, he and the dog walked back toward the man who was standing by the tree..
"What do you call this place?" the traveller asked..

"This is Heaven," he answered.

"Well, that's confusing," the traveller said. "The man down the road said that was Heaven, too."

"Oh, you mean the place with the gold street and pearly gates? Nope. That's hell."

"Doesn't it make you mad for them to use your name like that?"
"No, we're just ha pp y that they screen out the folks who would leave their best friends behind."

Soooo.
Sometimes, we wonder why friends keep forwarding jokes to us without writing a word..

Maybe this will explain..
When you are very busy, but still want to keep in touch, guess what you do? You forward jokes..
When you have nothing to say, but still want to keep contact, you forward jokes..
When you have something to say, but don't know what, and don't know how, you forward jokes..

Also to let you know that you are still remembered, you are still important, you are still loved, you are still cared for, guess what you get?
A forwarded joke..

So, next time if you get a joke, don't think that you've been sent just another forwarded joke, but that you've been thought of today and your friend on the other end of your computer wanted to send you a smile.

You are all welcome @ my water bowl anytime ..

P.S. – I personally hate dogs and all other animals .(By ashu...) "

Happy Birthday ashu !!!!

The Gambler

During the Great Depression, there was a man who walked into a bar one day. He went up to the bartender and said, "Bartender, I'd like to buy the house a round of drinks."

The bartender said, "That's fine, but we're in the middle of the Depression, so I'll need to see some money first."

The guy pulled out a huge wad of bills and set them on the bar. The bartender can't believe what he's seeing. "Where did you get all that money?" asked the bartender.

"I'm a professional gambler," replied the man.

The bartender said, "There's no such thing! I mean, your odds are fifty-fifty at best, right?"

"Well, I only bet on sure things," said the guy.

"Like what?" asked the bartender.

"Well, for example, I'll bet you fifty dollars that I can bite my right eye," he said.

The bartender thought about it. "Okay," he said.

So, the guy pulled out his false right eye and bit it. "Aw, you screwed me," said the bartender, and paid the guy his $50.

"I'll give you another chance. I'll bet you another fifty dollars that I can bite my left eye," said the stranger.

The bartender thought again and said, "Well, I know you're not blind, I mean, I watched you walk in here. I'll take that bet." So, the guy pulled out his false teeth and bit his left eye.

"Aw, you screwed me again!" protested the bartender.

"That's how I win so much money, bartender. I'll just take a bottle of your best scotch in lieu of the fifty dollars," said the man.

With that, the guy went to the back room and spent the better part of the night playing cards with some of the locals. After many hours of drinking and card playing, he stumbled up to the bar. Drunk as a skunk, he said, "Bartender, I'll give you one last chance. I'll bet you five hundred dollars that I can stand on this bar on one foot and piss into that whiskey bottle on that shelf behind you without spilling a drop."

The bartender once again pondered the bet. The guy couldn't even stand up straight on two feet, much less one. "Okay, you're on," he said.

The guy climbed up on the bar, stood on one leg, and began pissing all over the place. He hit the bar, the bartender, himself, but not a drop made it into the whiskey bottle.

The bartender was ecstatic. Laughing, the bartender said, "Hey pal, you owe me five hundred dollars!"

The guy climbed down off the bar and said, "That's okay. I just bet each of the guys in the card room a thousand bucks each that I could piss all over you and the bar and still make you laugh!"

Hotel Kerala-Fornia??!!

ha ha ha came across this funny piece of lyrics in the net.....no offense meant to all my mallu frens ..strictly with humorous intentions::::there was some audio with it too, but it was crap...

so Here goes::

The Hotel Kerala-fonia by The Yeagles

On the road to Trivandrum
Coconut oil in my hair
Warm smell of avial
Rising up through the air
Up ahead in the distance
I saw a bright pink tube-light
My tummy rumbled, I felt weak and thin
I had to stop for a bite
There he stood in the doorway
Flicked his mundu in style
And I was thinking to myself
I don't like the look of his sinister smile
Then he lit up a petromax
Muttering "No power today"
More Mallus down the corridor
I thought I heard them say
Welcome to the Hotel Kerala-fonia
Such a lousy place,
Such a lousy place (background)
Such a sad disgrace,
Plenty of bugs at the Hotel Kerala-fonia
Any time of year
Any time of year (background)
It's infested here
It's infested here
His finger's stuck up his nostril
He's got a big, thick mustache
He makes an ugly, ugly noise
But that's just his laugh
Buxom girls clad in pavada
Eating banana chips
Some roll their eyes, and
Some roll their hips
I said to the manager
My room's full of mice
He said,
Don't worry, saar,I sending you
meen karri, brandy and ice
And still those voices were crying from far away
Wake you up in the middle of the night
Just to hear them pray
Save us from the Hotel Kerala-fonia
Such a lousy place,
Such a lousy place (background)
Such a sad disgrace
Trying to live at the Hotel Kerala-fonia
It is no surprise
It is no surprise (background)
That it swarms with flies

The blind man was pouring
Stale sambar on rice
And he said
We are all just actors here
In Silk Smitha-disguise
And in the dining chamber
We gathered for the feast
We stab it with our steely knives
But we just can't cut that beef
Last thing I remember
I was writhing on the floor
That cockroach in my appam-stew was the culprit,
I am sure
Relax, said the watchman
This enema will make you well
And his friends laughed as they held me Down
God's Own Country? Oh, Hell!!